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Worldwide: Life ups and downs
Posted on Thursday, October 06 @ 08:40:26 MST by iljiana

Horse Humor I worked and slaved for many years until everything was sunny,
I chose one day to have some fun with all my hard earned money.
I bought a big 2 acre ranch out on the edge of town...

I bought a palomino horse that I could ride around.
And then I bought a saddle with a fancy padded seat,
And a silver conchoed bridle and some Justins for my feet.
I bought a jingle'n pair of spurs and a big ol' Stetsen hat.
I bought some Copenhagen for the pocket where I sat.
I bought a brand new trailer, and I spent a pretty buck
On a great big, shiny, 5 speed, tandem fifth wheel pick-up truck.
I had all my equipment, I was feeling proud and pert,
'Til that lowdown, onrey critter dumped my nose right in the dirt.
I hadda pay a horse trainer to break that yellar hide,
Then I paid a little extra and he taught me how to ride.
Though everything was fine now, I started feeling pensive,
This happy fun filled horsey life was getting right expensive.
No problem, though, I now was free to ride,
And thus enjoy my well broke, well trained toy with a palomino hide.
And then for a week that's what I did on my high dollar pet,
But then he got the colic and I had to call a vet.
Now if you're thinken that docters have a career that makes them wealthy,
Just wait til you pay a vets bill to keep your horses healthy!
Then ol' Yellar started limping when he stepped down on a clod,
So I paid another wad of bills and got that cayuse shod.
And if that wasn't quite enough then winter came my way,
So I had to build a barn and buy a load of hay
They I bought a quilted blanket and a matching quilted hood,
To keep ol' yellar warm and keep him lookin good.
And then I took a wife, and she had a girl and boy,
They liked to ride my horse so much, I bought one each for them.
I tossed more dollars at the vet, and at the trainer too,
And don't forget the farrier with his anvel and his shoe.
We had us 4 fine horses, now, so to get where we could ride,
I bought a bigger trailer yet, and more money I goodbyed.
Then both those silly youngsters took to ridin' rodeos.
Their gear and clothes and gasoline had me paying through the nose.
And here I am today my friends, in an agitated state,
Cause somehow, those 4 horses have multiplied to eight.
I'm horse rich and money poor and am suffering great remorse
For once I was a wealthy man till I went and bought a horse.

BAD JOKE DISCLAIMER: We recognize that horse humor can be risky. It is our hope that by laughing at ourselves (and others) we can make this subject more approachable. If you find any of these objectionable, we apologize. Many were posted on HorseScapes, some were passed along via email and others spotted on other websites. As with most jokes, the original authors are unknown -- but we thank them.

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